Ode to the Unopened Workout DVD

Ode to the Unopened Workout DVD

Project: Create a humorous ode to describe what often happens to workout DVDs. Good intentions, but often still stuck in their wrapper months later.


I sit here alone in my plastic cocoon,
Watching from up on your shelf
I know when you bought me you had good intentions
Of changing the shape of your self

I’ve got some ideas for how to get moving
It’s all right here wrapped up in me
“Who are you?” you say. Oh, you’re so kind for asking
I’m your old exercise DVD

We’ve both heard you say “Oh, that exercise thing?”
“I don’t think that I really do own it”
But I’m pretty sure that’s the excuse that you use
As you sit there and munch on a donut.

So, I’ll just keep waiting and hoping some day
That I’ll get to help you get in shape
But until that time comes I’ll be silently waiting…
And planning my secret escape